Many people have asked me why I am so God focused lately. I tell them, it was time!

You see for many years now I have been so lasered focused on developing and maintaining my business, that I missed pointing the laser where it should really be focused….On CHRIST. Yes, my business is imporant, however my life in Christ is much more important. When you place Him as the focal point, you soon find that God directs your path a bit differently.

I watched where He was leading and told myself that it was time to stop hiding under the rock of Being LASER FOCUSED.

I was scared that I would miss out on clients, income, and the brand I developed over the last two years. But then God showed me what my true brand was through wonderful women who emailed me, IM’d me, and even called me when something I said or did encouraged them. Every time I went on a new venture with my business or my life, these same women (even some men) would follow me with excitement about what God was going to do.

I did not get it then!

When I would share my life experiences with them, they would not be concerned about my business brand  but really more about my personal brand.

I still did not get it. I tried to stay laser focused because I had been so unsure before.

Finally one day day I was led to do an exercise where I sat down and wrote all of the things I enjoy doing, my skills, talents, and gifts. I was working on my branding story. How my brand came to be. What I learned was that the brand I was building was not the person God was molding before my very eyes. It was almost as is He were telling me to shut out the noise and listen to what He is saying.

If you read the bible then you know that God’s ways seem very strange.

• Abraham and Sarah having a baby at 100 and 99. Unheard of yet true!
• A donkey speaking. Unheard of yet true!
• Moses parting the Red Sea. Unheard of but true!
• David killing a giant with a stone! WOW! Unheard of but true!
• A virgin giving birth! Unheard of but true!
• Jesus raising from the dead! Unheard of but true!

So here I was faced with the same unheard of truths!

• Actually integrate my talents, skills, and spiritual gifts to create a more effective business. But that is unheard of!
• Use my life experience and passions to create a business that actually fits LaTara, serves others and glorifies God. Folks will think I have lost my mind. Surely business and faith do not mix.
• Be real with my approach to business. WOW!!! Get outta here God!
• Turn Life and Business Integration into a profitable business! But what about Social Savvy Online Solutions!
• Integrate and it will work the way God desires and I will be blessed! But GOD…..What’s in it for me?
• Remember this ain’t about LaTara but about God! Now that is an unheard of concept in this society!

What does all this mean?

First it means that I am my brand and I represent Christ in all I do. I am a very resourceful woman and God has been leading people to me who need what I have to offer and it is not about just one type of service or business. However, it is about the intertwining of my personality, passions, and purpose!

Second it means that God has some specific things that He has been wanting me to do for quite some time now that I have been avoiding:

• Write that book about moving beyond forgiveness because someone needs it. Otherwise why would God give me the thought and it never went away?
• Become a lifestyle coach who works with the work at home woman so that she creates a whole existence for a better business. Ok God but what about certification? Your life certifies you beyond what you would ever imagine!
• Help the Christian entrepreneur to stand strong on the Kingdom principles for a better business. HUH!!! Trust me my child, you have got the stuff!
• Use your passions to create an existence where you will joyously thrive!

I had been trapped in a box of being LASER FOCUSED that I was sitting on my true blessings!

So which way do I go? I will share with you what God has shown me so me thus far!

• I started Today is a Good Day with God: 365 Days of Biblical Affirmations back in March! God is weary of all the new age affirmations floating around the world so I am using my skills, talents, and gifts to bring an encouraging word from the Bible everyday for a year to the subscribers!
• I am working on a literary site (it is not ready but you can have a sneak peek) that will focus on books reviews, blog tours, information for aspiring writers and more. Why? I am a writer and I have ran from it for far too long. Plus I love reading and sharing information about good books!
• Life and Business Integration is growing. There are many work at home women entrepreneurs who need to understand the whole living approach from a Biblical perspective for a better business. I learned it and so can they!
• I have some niche site ideas where I will be using a psuedo name. I keep being pulled towards the direction of affiliate marketing and I am soaking up all sorts of information on the subject!
• I already have a good little amount of the book on moving beyond forgiveness written! Actually I wrote the content in 2007.
• I have been tightening up what I will offer as far as services over at Social Savvy Online Solutions. I don’t market it much but God has been bringing me clients which helps me to have a steady income!

In order to keep up with this new journey I have released some things. One of those things will be Mom Unplugged. Ok, well it is not going anywhere but I will not posting as often. I am sure my regular readers have noticed my lack of communicating here on the blog; but what I realized is that I started this blog as a way to heal, and I have healed in those areas. However God showed me that there are other women who need it too but not in the Mom Unplugged capacity because my niche goes beyond the mom. Not that moms are not important but I connect with many types of women; especially the Christian work at home woman!

Ok so this post is going to be rather long if I don’t stop. I will post a few more thoughts about these changes before God releases me from here but trust me when I say it is coming! The blog will always be here; and who knows maybe God will show me something different in the future as to what He wants done with Mom Unplugged but for now with tears in my eyes I say… it is almost time to say goodbye!

Fearfully and wonderfully, He created each and every part of me..
Without doubt the Master carved my greatness into being.
With strokes of love He painted a rich vibrant color all over my body.
Each time He touched me He thought of how wonderful my life would be.

He saw my days and wrote each one down in the book of life.
With careful thought He penned each bump, obstacles,
and the victory I would have in the midst of it all.
He knew I would be one to accept His Son
and that the enemy would try and steal me away.

Yet as He wrote, He knew that in my life He would be glorified.

My heart He etched with love;
a deep loyal, abiding love that would spread to others like fire
My mind He carved out to take His word and use it for healing
and to light the path towards His truth;
Not just for me, but for each and every soul that I come in contact with.
My spirit He molded into one that would be burdened with the issues of many;
Knowing that I would take the risk and receive the calling.

Each moment of my creation was glorious
Each part of me was carefully thought out
Making my calling sure

So with each step that I take, I give Him the praise
I lift my hands and heart to Him
My life I give right back to Him
Knowing that through it all
When God made me He created an awesome beauty.

Now I ask you…

What is your creation story?

Today I Facebook I posted the following…

My life this year took me from high to low to high again but God’s grip of grace never left me. He held me tight and never let me go! As the man-ordained year comes to an end, I am grateful for the many lessons learned, the confidence gained, the boldness to expect nothing but the best from God!

I started 2009 with high hopes for my business and boy did it start with a bang. However, one thing that very few knew was that by May is was starting to wane a bit. By June I was getting just enough to pay a few business bills. I was literally wondering where my next dollar would come from. I was not in the poverty state of mind that I was in when I wrote about having a poverty mentality.

This time it was different. I was hungry. Not for power or even money. I was hungry to get it right and follow through with all that I needed to do.

When I was in the poverty state of mind, I would have just given up!

But this time I had fallen and I knew I could get up. Sure there were times when I was discouraged and I asked God what was this all about. What was a missing? Who needs to know my story in order to be healed and set free? Why did He choose me for this test?

What do I do?

I fell but I found my way up.

I restructured my business, listened to God and not man, and went back to my call of helping women as mandated by God, and put my priorities back on track.

I can say that through it all the following occurred…

• Most of my business bills we able to be paid with the exception of one and that one was practically given to me until I am able to pay again.
• I was able to complete all the learning for my business I wanted to this year
• My kids did not go without
• I did not miss a meal
• I had to buy a new computer and while I had to make payments on it, I have been able to do that
  

The lesson here is that you may fall but you can get back up.

Today I was reminded of the lesson from a friend who sent me a link to an amazing video. It is a HUGE reminder that there is no excuse not to get back up!

This year has been a testing on for me. I discovered that in so many ways on I am on target with what God has for me to do and in others I miss the target by a long shot. However, through it all I have been tremendously blessed.

At the beginning of this year I had it all planned out how my year would go. I was going to be Forty, Fit, and Fine.  I did reach a lot of those goals: I am about 40 lbs smaller, I did turn 40, I started caring about myself more, and I learned to appreciate all that God has blessed me with.

To know that I am worth more than rubies in His eyes so much so that He knows the number of hairs on my head amazed me to no end. Once I grabbed on to that fact… I AM WORTH SOMETHING…it changed the way I approached my entire life.

God is just good like that!

As I considered my business and how it fits with my life I saw some things I like and some I did not like. I enjoyed the fact that I was actually making an income online. I loved that God was directing much of it. I did not like the fact that I was not giving Him total control. I did not like that fact that I was missing out on some tremendous blessing because I did not give Him total control.

Over the past few months my life has been shaken up quite a bit. To such a point that I have had to truly look at where I was in life. I had to access my strengths and weaknesses; consider my principles and values; and look at my true mission in life.

I had no other choice. God literally had my life at a standstill in the area of business. Everything seemed to go south and nothing was working the right. I was not getting it. I was working everyday at something but the outcome was not as I always expected.

I took some time to speak with two women who are just gems to me and realized some things. I needed a serious adjustment in my approach to a few things.

I was working from a standpoint outside of my scope of values and principles. Yes,  I was within the scope on so many levels but I was starting to become discouraged by the lack of dollars and it was driving me into positions I did not care to be in. I was starting to get desperate and even ended up working on a project that cost me in the end. I did not hear God say no but I did see the warning signs early on and just kept at it.

Ahh well…lesson learned!

Here is the core of what I learned:

• When you think that God is giving you something if you are not sure what to do with it…wait! He will reveal it to you. It is ok to step back for a  while, evaluate and just wait. Don’t move ahead until it is revealed to you whether or not it is for you do.
• If you feel led to help someone, don’t allow them to step over you and then come back for more. Some folks will give you a pity story over and over again just to get your sympathy, milk you like there is no tomorrow, and then leave you with the empty carton.
• Stay within the scope of your core values and principles. In everything you do, use them as you gauge. If what is before you does not fit then it is likely not for you.

I saw that – especially with business – staying within the core is what matters most.

So I am biting the bullet on a few things in my life. For the purposes of this post, I will share one of them.

• I will be writing more than I have in some years. I am signing up with Examiner.com for the Oklahoma City area, and I am once again going to take on writing clients. One of my values is that I care about the whole health of my family. When I was sticking with the writing finances were good. It was where God told me to go and I heeded. Then I got greedy and went way out of my scope. Not that I was not to add more to be list of services but that I totally left the writing out because it did not fit what I wanted to do. Instead of scaling back on the writing some, I  stopped all together. I even stopped writing my devotions, encouraging words and articles for magazines. I was tired of doing it; and yet, writing is my love!

Sometimes you have to get to your breaking point to see the big picture. This past summer I was there.

I am writing my core values and principles out again so that I have them to gauge where I am and what I am doing. God has given me a list and over the next few months you will see some stuff that I am not even sure how to implement…and yet He has put the task before me.

Like the core of an apple, if what is on the inside starts to rot due to lack of care, then the flesh will just smell and taste nasty. I don’t want my core rotting to the cause of stench. As a servant who lives life on purpose, I must allow my core to be nurtured for the glory of God!

Today they paid tribute to Michael Jackson and I thought it was a wonderful tribute. What has saddened me are the many children of God who have taken it upon themselves to be judge and jury. One thing that my husband told me was that, just as Christ, we have to look beyond the man we see to the soul of the person.

Regardless of what we think about a person or assume to know, to look at a man based on the color, the rumors, and accusations we do not even have the criteria it takes to place judgement upon anyone. Yes, have an opinion but know that for every opinion you have of someone, there is one of you too. What do you want people to think of you?

You can say you do not care what people think, but the bottom line is that unless you are a heartless person with no emotions, you do care to some extent. Words hurt….I know this for myself.

In looking at Michael’s life and from what was said today and in the past, I guess I see a lot of myself. I have always been a strange child and wondered why I was different. As the years went on I began to feel lonely and without anyone to truly get who LaTara was. From the uniqueness of my name “LaTara Venise Bussey” to” LaTara Venise Ham-Ying”  to the way I choose to share my very core,I was ridiculed for the differences I displayed.

My supposed defects were taken and raked through the coal over and over again. It was as if I were the elephant woman and so when I looked in the mirror I saw a girl who was not very pretty. Imagine how Michael felt when he was teased. I can imagine it…can you?

I may not have been a genius like Micheal, but I was a very wise child who also had to grow up faster than she should have. Molestation and abuse does a lot to the psyche of a child. Trust me I know! While I was a child at heart, there were things that occurred in my life that no child should have to ever see or experience. It messed me up!

Please note that I am not saying that Michael Jackson was molested or abused. That is my story.

I say all of that to say that you never know what pain, turmoil, and tragedy lies behind the face you see in front of you or on the television. And like my momma always said “Unless you hear it from the horse mouth, don’t put a lot of stock in it.”

I hate to see people murder someone’s character and not consider their own defects. Sadly, many children of God do this very thing and this is why so many people lose faith and leave the very thing that will save them…because of the Sadducees and Pharisees of modern times. Excuse me for being so blunt but I have never been one to mince words.

We all have defects. I can name at least 10 of mine. How many of your personal defects can you name?

Today I pray and implore you to look beyond the person that just might be encouraged, motivated, or dare I say, saved because you took the time to leave perception behind and look into the soul of the man.

For me my former Pastor, and my spiritual mother and dearest friend who passed in December of 2002 were the people who looked beyond the woman people said would lie, cheat, and steal and saw the soul of a woman who was in pain and ready for a change. Today I am the woman I am in part because they encouraged, motivated, and led me towards Christ who I accepted in March 1989.

I was speaking with a good friend of mine who attended a Mom Bloggers’ event this week and she notices something that I have often complained to her about. There was a limited number of African American bloggers. When asked about the fact that there were not a lot of African American bloggers, the response was that they could not find them.

Hmmmm! So what are my thoughts on this?

I have been itching at the bits for a while to write on this topic. The lack of Afrian American bloggers and social media experts being passed over for so much has bugged me to no end. However, I am not upset because it appears to be under the cover racism. I am not mad because people are making excuses not to come in contact with the African American community on a deeper level.  No, this is a two way street.

Everyone has some fault.

Up until last year, I kept quiet about the subject. However, there is an event that came up this year that I had to make a stand on.I contacted the Coordinator of a popular event and community and informed her that the fact there were no African American women, or, colored women for the fact ,speaking at her up coming event was not cool. The response I got was the to her the internet was colorless. I was shocked because last time I checked when you look at my picture, you see a very pretty caramel momma.

Now I was asked to be a speaker at the next event for this popular group but I have yet to be contacted about it and really, I am ok with it. I am used to it. It even felt like more of a bandaid as opposed to a solution to the problem.

This led me to do some research and what I found did not shock me at all. The majority of the blog  and social media events do not have African Americans in the line up. I know many intelligent African Americans who are well versed in these areas and not to seek them out is just wrong.

I can name 10 African American Mom bloggers…

1. Mahogany Momma’s Black Parenting Blog
2. Black and Married with Kids
3. Quiskaeya
4. Cutie Booty Cakes
5. Mel, A Dramatic Mommy
6. The Integrated Mother
7. Ebony Mommy
8. My Brown Baby
9. Momma Law
10. Mom In The City

So as you see there are many African American Mom bloggers. As a matter of fact, Disney sponsors an event every year for African American mom bloggers and from what I read they love it.

The bottom line on both ends is that we all have to cross the bridge.

I love my people, but I am a lover of not just African Americans but people in general. However, there is a richness and quality about the African American community that is alive and full of passion. But we do tend to migrate in groups that belong to only “us”. We will create groups that are African American in nature, join and stay there. Never really reaching out to the community around us.

That is not good either. How can people find us?

As an African American woman my goal is to show not just people who share my hue, but all people the beauty of the woman God is creating me to be. It is not about my color but my character. And if people refuse to see that because I am a caramel woman, then that is their lost. I cannot do anything about it but share my views.

I think that there are still many bridges to be crossed in the blogging and social media arenas.

• Bridges that see beyond the color
• Bridges that look beyond the stereotypes
• Bridges that go beyond what group I may or may not belong to
• Bridges that teach people to see someone for who they are and not for what they think the person may be

I want to challenge every person reading this today to look at a person for who they are. If you are a coordinator or owner of a community that has blogging events, find those mom bloggers of color (black, brown, olive, and the rest) and ask them to be a part of the event. If you are thinking that you can’t find them they are there.

I simply did a search and found the ten I listed here.

I plan on blogging more and bringing the truth to light. It is high time we stop hiding behind the excuses and reach out to the community at large. We segment ourselves too much and this should just not be.The world is made of many different colors and we tend to stick to what we know.

It is time to step out of the box of perception and look at the real world that sits on the horizon.

I am looking fora new cell service. My current one is good but I want to save a few dollars and get a better phone. Currently I have $10 special and trust me when I say it is a $10 special.

I started browsing online for cell phone companies, wondering if any of them will fit my budget and my needs. My cell phone is not a business phone but I do still need unlimited minutes. My current plan only give me 400 daytime with unlimited nights and weekends. However, there are times when I need to talk more in the day time than at night. I mean really, night time is for sleeping first and foremost; and by the time that I get done with work, the only thing I want to do it relax. I talk all day, so the phone at night is not what this woman needs.

Plus with my current plan I have to pay for texting and that is just not cool.

As I was browsing, I ran across Cricket Mobile and discovered that I can save about $25 per month. That is $300 per year. That is a huge savings when you really think about it. Plus the phones they offer are way more sleek and stylish than the current one I have. And with the prices being so good, I can get my son a phone as well and pay what I was with my current plan; but we are getting two for one.

That means I can bug my son all day long through the summer with text messages galore. He will just love that

I will update you on my decision to keep my current service or move over to Cricket.

I have been moving my butt now for 3 weeks and it feels great. It is about choice. So what’s your choice! I would love to know what you think about choices, how we make them, and why. What are some proactive methods we can take in making choices that will enhance our lives and the lives of those we love? What are some negative aspects of making the wrong choices?

If you know me or have read my blog for any amount of time, then you know that reflection is a huge part of my existence. I reflect on much because in life there is always something to chew on that can you can learn and grow from. So this past month I have been reflecting on many things.

My life is far from perfect but right now I am finally in the place I have been desiring to be in for so long. My mind is being transformed daily right before my eyes and I can only give glory to the God I love and serve. It was His grace and mercy that kept me even when I did not want Him to. I have confessed to Him and others that there was  point in this journey when I did not like God and I wanted to be as far away from Him presence as I possibly could. Every part of my being just wanted God to leave me alone and yet every part longed to feel His love for me.

It was a tug of war that I am glad He won.

My time over the last month has been spent sharing and opening up to my husband because finally he is listening and that is a miracle in itself. For the first 6 years it was not good and I have not hidden that fact. Why did I stay and suffer the way I did? Because we were both in bad places and we fed off of one another’s misery.

I woke up first and told him that I was no longer taking it; so either he wake up, smell the coffee and change the flavor or I was out the door. This was last summer and I think that is when he started waking up. You see when you are in the pit you bring people in it with you and when you are the head of your home it is even worse. This is where we were.

God is so good though, because even in the midst of my confusion and anger towards him, when I wanted to go, God said no and reminded me that it was Him who put us together. That’s right God did it and He had reason for it. But I forgot the promise God made to me before I got married. I forgot it all and lost myself in trying to be everything that this man wanted and nothing that he really needed.

He needed my sassy mouth and personality to boot. Not that I was to down talk him but I was to be open and very frank with him. But I let this man’s misery become my downfall and I slipped back into the pit with him.

That was my fault. God had nothing to do with my choice.

Today we are in a good place. It is not great but we are talking, praying together again, and learning to love one another in a new way. That is a good thing.

So you see the process of repositioning in a continual daily exercise. Your mind must be renewed daily, your spirit must be emptied of the junk and filled with God’s love, your life must be yield over daily.

My desire and need to become the authentic woman of God that I was meant to be is not something that I can take lightly. For me it is like a thirst that I can never quench. Every day I long for God’s love to surround me.

I told a good friend and mentor of mine about two weeks that I am tired of sending up a stench to God. He deserves the sweet aroma of all that I can be in Christ. So I strive daily to send Him that smell. I strive to give Him the sweetness of LaTara.

I am still repositioning and God has definitely given me the map to be able to do this. I would love to share this map with you. I have a new program for women seeking a sweeter existence in Christ through authentic live. Pathways to Authentic Living started out as a series of articles I created from a speech I gave in 2008.  From reading these articles, I realized that God had given me a map to change that is a powerful tool to helping you become the woman of God you were always meant to be. It can be the perfect repositioning tool for any woman seeking serious change. I know because the map was my repositioning tool.

Stay Connected,
I do try,
Yet it proves a task difficult;
even for the most disciplined child.

The demands of the day,
The time it takes to work;
And, yes, even play;
makes coming to You a pretty hard things to do.

Ahh but the importance
of Plugging in,
Is so hard to ignore,
Because Your presence
Surrounds me
And my spirit says
“He is here”.

Reminding me that
obeying,
following,
doing,
praising,
worshiping,
Is impossible to do;
If My Mind,
My Spirit,
My Body,
Does not Connect to You.

Copyright 2008 LaTara Ham-Ying